I made up a Smash Bros. clone with the folks behind Fallout, Dishonored, and Prey

Bethesda has assembled a distinct roster of characters in the last decade, whether by creating instant-classics like Dishonored (opens in new tab), or by buying the talent and/or rights behind existing series like Doom and Fallout. And as Nintendo has proven several times over, the best thing to do with a beloved cast of video game characters is to make them fight.

Being essentially 10 years old, I asked every developer I interviewed at QuakeCon 2016 what kind of cool moves and outfits their respective characters would have in a theoretical Super Bethesda Bros. Again, this is all hypothetical, and I have no reason to believe Bethesda is working on a cross-franchise fighting game (but if it does end up happening I take full credit). All that said, these are the designs we came up with.

Corvo Attano, Dishonored series

Special Attack: Harvey Smith, the co-creative director of Dishonored developer Arkane Studios, was tempted to go with the “creepy and fascinating” Possession ability for Corvo’s special attack. But since his defining hour in the original Dishonored was set against the Rat Plague, Smith had to go with Corvo’s equally disturbing Devouring Swarm power. That’s the one that makes dozens of rats emerge from the void and devour everything in their path, alive or dead. Maybe don’t let Corvo build up his special meter.

Alternate Outfit: “I guess Corvo’d probably have something more romantic, right”, Smith reasoned. “So he’s got his Royal Protector outfit, muddy boots and all that. But he probably also has something like a billowy pirate shirt, for the romance [novel] cover.” I think I ripped my bodice a bit just thinking about it.

Emily Kaldwin, Dishonored series

Special Attack: In Dishonored 2 (opens in new tab), Emily has grown up to be just as deadly of an eldritch-powered killer as her proud father. But they’re not exactly alike. Emily’s powers reflect both her status as a ruler and the disturbing events of her childhood. One of her most powerful “gifts” from the Outsider (and Smith’s pick for Super Bethesda Bros. special attack) is Domino, which lets her chain the fates of several people together. Pop off a Domino, then KO one opponent and you KO them all!

Alternate Outfit: Emily would be a little bit more conservative than Corvo the romantic swashbuckler. She “probably has something that allows her to blend in more,” Smith said, “the brown riding jacket, or something that she takes out for fox hunts”.

Morgan Yu, Prey

Special Attack: Prey (opens in new tab)’s protagonist can turn into a coffee mug. He or she (you could play as either gender in SBB, just like Robin and Corrin in Super Smash Bros. for Wii U & 3DS) can use the Mimic ability to transform into a bunch of other stuff, too, but the mug was the clear crowd favorite at QuakeCon’s extended Prey gameplay demo (opens in new tab). Lead designer Ricardo Bare insisted that the coffee mug form in particular would be Morgan’s special attack, despite it leaving you quite small and literally unarmed. Maybe you could tip over and spill your scalding hot contents on the other players?

Alternate Outfit: “That’s kind of both in one!” Bare exclaimed about the coffee mug. He got me there.

Doom Marine, Doom series

Special Attack: After I assured Doom (opens in new tab) director Marty Stratton that his character could have a weapon in this utterly derivative game we were making up, his response was immediate. “It would probably have to be something where he grabs the other player by the chest and pulls out the Super Shotgun and blows their head off. And a big fountain of blood comes out of the top of it.” So Super Bethesda Bros. is going for an M-Rating, I asked? “We’re Id, we don’t do anything lower!”

Alternate Outfit: “I would have to go with the classic bare midriff, no sleeves, leather gloves [Doomguy design from the original game],” Stratton said. Then we tossed around some ideas about why the Doomguy originally had an armor cutout over his tummy; Stratton said with a six-pack like that you pretty much have to, while I speculated that he was on his way to belly dance class when the demonic invasion broke out.

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